Changes

No one likes uninvited change. No one likes to be put in a difficult situation where things they loved and cherished were taken away from them.

"ITS NEVER TOO LATE TO BE WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN" - GEORGE ELIOT

Welcome back to Lunar Blogs guys!

CHANGE, recently I took a break from writing due to this virus outbreak I felt I needed a mental shutdown and just PAUSE for a second. Even though I missed writing a lot I needed to process all of this unexpected change in my life and all of our lives because I know I am not the only one feeling all of this.

I cannot help but to think deeper into all of this and see it as a smack in the face, and a one way ticket for all of us back to reality. The world showing us that we are not invincible and that money, power, and material things really do not mean shit at the end of the day. When it comes to something this big we all need to take a step back and reevaluate what really matters and appreciate the people we love.

So all of this definitely got me thinking about when us as human beings, get thrown an unexpected and uninvited change in our lives. If there is one thing I have always admired about us is that we are passionate about the things and people we love, we are hungry for life and we want the best for everyone we care about so we will go out of our way to make that change and make that move. There are certain changes though that we just cannot stop in life, and if there is one thing I have always noticed is how not only do we endure physical pains in our lives but mental pains and that to me has to be harder than anything else.

As sad as all this virus outbreak is with all the deaths and all the sick. I know a lot of you feel as powerless as I do sometimes not being able to help. I have noticed the toll that it has taken on people mostly is their mental health. The idea of a change in our regular lives, not being able to go out when we want to or the freedom of walking around anywhere we want. The fact that we have to stay at home, and if we go out we have to be careful and panic about everything we touch and anyone we see, it is crazy! It is overwhelming and truthfully a horrible thing to have to go through.

During the time I have been quarantined a lot has gone through my mind and I have had to pull through a lot of mental breakdowns, every day is different and everyday I try.

I was listening to one of my favorite podcast this morning (Your Own Magic with Raquelle Mantra) and they were interviewing this poet I had never heard about before called IN-Q. Within the first few minutes I was already hooked on everything he had to say and then he shared a poem that is written in his most recent book. The poem is amazing he starts with "There is nothing in life that you cannot breathe through except death, and since we are all alive it means at least there is one breath left."- IN-Q

That first verse resonated with me so deeply. Maybe because this week I have found it so hard to breathe, who knows. Most importantly though I interpreted the entire poem with how much us humans want to live, but we find it hard to accept that there needs to be a change. The world, humanity needs help to get back to understanding what is truly important. Even though we are going through really hard times and I wish this was not the way to show us we need to change. I really do hope that the world gets the message. When we all get through this it will be almost like we have a second chance. It is not over until it is.

The last few words were the ones that stuck with me the most,

" Hey, sure there is someone else with something more important to say. But until then I am living each and every fucking day so when I take a breath I do it like I swear I am here to stay." - IN-Q (Inquire Within)

When you find yourself scared wether it was because you just started overthinking about everything going on, someone brought it up or you turned on the news and heard nothing good. Remember that you are still here, your family and friends are healthy and look around you to what really matters. There is always tomorrow, but today you take a step back and appreciate everything you have. We have a lot more fight left in us.

- DG

There was another different type of change I wanted to talk about, what about the unexpected changes in our lives like a change of job, change of personal relationships, a change in your regular routine?

How different do we handle those and cope with those. We think or view those as just regular things we have to endure in life. Though we can all agree that all those changes are the ones who shape us and are extremely hard to handle. I believe is the control of the situation that makes the difference. When you feel like you are in control of your own life, even though you are scared or hurt you push through the situation. The fear of the unknown is what makes something like this pandemic a different type of scary, because we have no way of knowing what the next day will bring.

That does not mean that when faced with a change in your life whether it is your job or something personal that it means any less. We are taught to be so strong and to push through everything, a lot of the time we forget to feel. I grew up thinking that I was weak because I felt so deeply and I would see all of my friends go through heartbreaks and move on to the next one so easily, while I was still stuck on the one that hurt me months ago (still eating chocolate ice cream, and crying myself to sleep). I felt weaker than them because I did not know how to accept that change.

Why should we have to shy away from showing how we truly feel. I want to feel it all, in my heart in my soul and in my mind. For me that is the only way to move forward and get through things. Whether it is a heartbreak or a global pandemic. It terrifies me, I get scared I do not know what is coming next. Instead of telling people I am handling it well, I accept that I have about two to three panic attacks a day now when I find myself a lone, when I realize that just by going out and forgetting about all of this, that I might touch something and I can get sick. I get scared that I keep on making the wrong mistakes everyday, that I will be alone forever or that I may lose my best friend.

My first thoughts when all of this quarantine happen was "Really bad timing". It came honestly at a really bad time. Unfortunately life does not care what you are going through. It will not apologize or say "sorry, I will come back when it is a better time". What ever it is, we all have to go through changes, and it will not be easy it will be hard. The important thing is to push through, to INHALE and EXHALE the entire way through and remember that you are alive that there is tomorrow and that it is okay to be scared.

Wether this blog post was a reminder to myself, or maybe it resonated with you. like IN-Q said "I am living each and every fucking day." and so should you.

" EACH MORNING WE ARE BORN AGAIN. WHAT WE DO TODAY IS WHAT MATTERS MOST - BUDDHA"

This is day (I do not even know anymore) of Quarantine and I hope that everyone is doing okay, that everyone is healthy and safe. Please do your part in helping the world get better, this is one of those times that one person really does make a difference. Keep everyone battling this in your thoughts and like I always say Stay Positive! but this time around also Stay Home!

Namaste

(Daisy Gonzalez)